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We can have difficulty with discounting the positives in our life, but taking the time to acknowledge them makes them all the more powerful. Authentic forgiveness is not forgetting or denying the effects of something, but instead learning to transition from resentment to connection. According to the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous , resentment is what destroys more alcoholics than anything else, because it ultimately leads to futility and unhappiness, shutting us out from the sunlight of the spirit.

They may have come from a background of abuse. They may have never learned to communicate. They may come from a long ling of addicts.

What Forgiveness Is and Isn't

They may have experienced a serious trauma. They may be experiencing chronic, untreated pain. There are any number of reasons beneath the surface that can be recognized and empathized with. Here are some ways in which you can practice forgiveness for others. The disease of addiction is something that rewires the brain and changes the way people think. Addicts go against all logic and sense to use because they are no longer in control of themselves.

When you understand that addiction is not a choice, you can accept that your loved one has a sickness and that they need treatment. You can send the letter if you wish, or if the person is deceased you can burn the letter in a symbolic gesture. In some cases, you may find it impossible to forgive another person. They may continue using or they may refuse to acknowledge the pain they inflicted upon you.

The Importance of Forgiveness in Recovery | Clear Sky Recovery

In any case, it may take time for you to understand their disease. In the meantime, you can surrender the burden of hurt and continue to live your life.

Make a Decision

Forgiveness is an act of self-love. When you forgive yourself, self-acceptance begins and self-love grows. Patrick Miller. Forgive yourself quickly and as often as necessary. Encourage yourself. Tell yourself good things about yourself. To learn more about coping methods and useful tools for recovery, visit the Landmark Recovery Blog. If you or a loved one are seeking help to treat a substance abuse disorder, reach out to our admissions team. Reach out to Landmark Recovery's drug rehab and alcohol rehab today to begin your journey to a better tomorrow.

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Landmark of Lexington. Call Today Find me on: LinkedIn. Why Should You Forgive? Picture yourself all grown up and able to comfort and love that little child.

The Importance of Forgiveness in Recovery

The rest of forgiving others will come to you. All 12 step programs have some component that addresses forgiving yourself and others. No matter what steps you use you will know that you have forgiven when you notice that your heart is softened. From this point of view you will begin to find good in all that you have, and gratitude for the gift of life. When we forgive, we give up the mistaken belief that we are in need of someone to fix what is wrong.

Forgiveness – Part I

When we forgive we move from being a victim to being an empowered person. Continue to practice forgiving until you have run out of people and things to forgive. It may take a while, but eventually, you will see less and less need to forgive because you are enjoying all the good that life has to offer. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Currently you have JavaScript disabled. In order to post comments, please make sure JavaScript and Cookies are enabled, and reload the page.

Click here for instructions on how to enable JavaScript in your browser. What I would say to them is, go ahead and forgive—you have no idea how good it will make you feel. Letting go of harboring resentment towards someone. Letting go of the need to exact revenge or harm or suffering on someone.


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Letting go of the reenactment of being hurt by someone. Harboring negative emotions, especially unexpressed or lingering anger, creates a state of chronic anxiety, which leads to increased production of adrenaline and cortisol; in excess, these chemicals compromise immune system function. Holding a grudge, as they say, hurts you more than it hurts them. Research has also found a link between anger and self-forgiveness.

In one, Macaskill found that people who were unable to forgive other people had no declines in life satisfaction or mental health. However, those unable to forgive themselves experienced reductions in both psychological well-being and life satisfaction.

Why forgive?

Shame, guilt, anxiety, and anger were all predictors of self-unforgiveness. So in forgiving, I am claiming my part in things, and that clears the air, and that gives me room to let go and move on. Our emotional sobriety falls apart long before our physical sobriety does. Sometimes, it just takes time.


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